did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
