too bad you live with your parents still
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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