oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Randomize
