Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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