Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
