Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize
