2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
