sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize