YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
