Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize
