why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize