I want you more than these girls want KFC
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
