I feel like abortions should bother me more
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
