Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
