after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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