Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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