I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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