Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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