i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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