how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
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