I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
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