ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
This is my gift to your gina
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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