So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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