Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
