It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I pour the whiskey from now on
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
