SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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