lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
