Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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