Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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