when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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