i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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