Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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