You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
