I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
