Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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