i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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