We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
i now understand why vodka
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Randomize
