the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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