Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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