yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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