I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
