so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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