I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Randomize
