and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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