So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
me + whiskey = a bad person
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize
