hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Randomize
