If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
bring money and cleavage
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
