He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
