i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Randomize
