Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Randomize
