I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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