I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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